🌿 The Hard Truth

Part 1 of the “Inward Shift” Series: Healing Your Attachment Style and Reclaiming Your Power

This is the hard truth:
Healing isn’t just about leaving toxic people.

It’s about facing the toxic patterns we’ve inherited, internalized, and participated in — even unknowingly.

It’s about reaching that pivotal moment where you ask yourself:
Do I want to stay in a victim mindset… or am I ready to step into the power of a survivor?
One keeps you stuck.

The other sets you free.

Recently, a mirror in my own life has been lifted — not to the people who’ve hurt me, or the chaos I’ve survived — but to myself.

It’s been years of healing. Layer after layer. Year after year. And while I’ve grieved, grown, and softened so many of the wounds that life has handed me… this season has invited me into the hardest work of all:

• Looking at the ways I’ve hurt myself.

• Looking at the patterns I repeat.

• Looking at the places where my fear still runs the show.

• Looking at how trauma shaped my communication, my self-worth, and even the love I’m willing to accept.

This is the part of healing most people avoid.
The part where we stop pointing fingers… and start holding the mirror.
Where we stop asking, “Why do people keep hurting me?” and start asking,
“What unhealed part of me keeps calling them in?”

If you’re still reading this, I already know something about you:
You’re ready.

Ready to break free from patterns that leave you stuck.
Ready to stop settling for bare-minimum relationships.
Ready to do the work… even when it’s uncomfortable.

This six-part blog series is for the woman who’s tired of being at war with her own needs.
Who’s spent years managing everyone else’s emotions — and is finally ready to understand her own.

🌱 This Week’s Invitation: Turn Inward

No matter how much trauma you’ve experienced — no matter how toxic your past relationships were — we all have patterns and behaviors that we carry into new relationships. And if we want to grow… we have to name them.

This first week is about turning your focus inward.
Not with shame. But with compassion. Curiosity. Grace.

💡 What Is an Attachment Style?

Your attachment style is the lens through which you give and receive love.
It’s formed early in life — usually from your relationship with caregivers — and it deeply impacts how you show up in adult relationships.

There are four primary types:

1. Secure – You feel safe giving and receiving love. You can ask for what you need and give others the space to do the same.

2. Anxious – You crave closeness, but often fear abandonment. You might over-communicate, people please, or spiral if you sense distance.

3. Avoidant – You value independence and may feel overwhelmed by emotional closeness. You might pull away when things get too vulnerable.

4. Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized) – You crave connection but also fear it. You might swing between clinginess and withdrawal, and often struggle with trust.

Your attachment style is not your fault.
But once you know it, it becomes your responsibility.

Because when you understand your attachment style, you stop blaming other people for how they love you — and start advocating for how you want to be loved.

✍️ Journal Prompts

This week, take some time to reflect on the following (also check out the bottom of this blog for free resources to use during your exploration this week into attachment styles):

• What patterns keep showing up in your relationships?

• When conflict happens, do you tend to withdraw, chase, shut down, or over-explain?

• What messages did you learn about love growing up?

• When was the last time you felt safe and fully seen in a relationship? What made that possible?

• Where do you abandon yourself to keep someone else close?

🌸 Strawberry Challenge:

“One Pause Before I React”

Every day this week, when something triggers you — a partner doesn’t text back, a friend cancels plans, a child is being difficult — take one full breath before reacting. Ask yourself:

Is this about now, or is this about something old?

You don’t have to fix it right away. Just notice. That awareness alone is healing.

🍓 A Note From Me to You

This work is sacred.
It’s not glamorous.
It won’t give you a quick dopamine hit.
But it will change your life.

You’re not too broken.
You’re not too needy.
You’re just ready to stop outsourcing your worth.

And I’m walking this path beside you.

I encourage you to take some time this week to research attachment styles, watch videos on them, take quizzes and learn what attachment style you believe you are.

🌀 Coming Next:

Blog 2 — “Anxious Attachment: When You Just Want to Feel Chosen”

We’ll explore how anxious attachment develops, how it shows up in love, and gentle tools for rebuilding security — from the inside out.

If you’re ready to go deeper, subscribe for free weekly tools from The Strawberry Sanctuary: healing templates, journal prompts, to help you reconnect with yourself.

Let’s come home — together. 💗